Fibro Log - Day 1

Day 1 - Tracking conditions: Fibromyalgia, TMJ/Bruxism, and related maladies.
Weight: 222
Plan: 800 mg FA guai 2x today, one sertraline, probably going to be hitting the ibuprofen liqui-gel train hard this afternoon as going to Disney.

It's Saturday. I woke up at 8:15 am. My mind was AWAKE. I thought about going back to sleep, but since I spit out my mouthguard sometime in the middle of the night, and woke up with my shoulders scrunched up around my ears, I figured -- based on some reading I did this week about bruxism happening more in light sleep so dozing is a very bad idea-- that going back to sleep would only leave me feeling more stiff and sore when I finally did drag myself out of bed. So I got up.

Head: I wouldn't call it a headache. It's just that heaviness I have, almost daily... It feels almost as if I am wearing a football helmet, with heavy shoulder pads to match. I guess it's "headache light."
Mouth: my back upper teeth are humming a bit. Clearly from spitting out my guard. I need to re-form it so it doesn't fall/get spit out during the night.
Body: shoulders and upper back are not great. Stiff and sore. Upper arms somewhat "burny" and heavy. Side of neck tight but not as bad as usual. "Back-hip" and legs somewhat weak and achy. Joy. So, hurts to sit, stand, lie down... all of it. I adore being 86, it's a real trip!
Energy: not great but could be worse.
Mood: pretty good. got some things done around the house and going to Disney tonight for Halloween. Not feeling stressed.

Valley of the Sauls... Trying to make it in a city full of shysters, with 30-something problems, Fibromyalgia, and a neurotic Cherrier to deal with.

It's been 11 months since my last confession... I mean run. A whole summer, fall, and winter of emotional upheaval has passed, and in return, I've gained about 20-25 pounds... because every disaster needs a cherry on top.

I've changed relationship statuses, residences, jobs, health problems, and hairstyles (thank you, Michelle Obama for the "bang movement" of 2012-2013). I went through the "inspirational messages as my iPhone background" phase and am coming out of bitter and more bitter phase... or so we can hope. It's time to focus on what I know I want, which is pretty straight forward. As I have since about fourth grade, I want to lose a small (as in little-person-sized version of myself) person -- which at age 32 is around 60 pounds, and I want to write for scripted television, full-time, to an extent that it is my career and primary/only means of financial support. Beyond that, I just don't fucking know, so I'm not going to guess or try to get ahead of myself or push myself into a preconceived notion of what my life should be/look like. 

I am not well, but I would be better if I were getting regular exercise and avoiding sugar/certain carbs. I have fibromyalgia and am hypoglycemic -- i.e. I am in constant pain, have headaches daily, have constant fatigue, do not produce a normal amount of ATP (energy) and I go into a waking coma shortly after eating almost any amount of starches/sweets. Also my right foot is almost always swollen, which is really sexy when you are on a date and your foot looks like rising bread dough trying to escape a sandal-trap.

I called this new blog "Valley of the Sauls," in honor of my favorite shady-character, Saul Goodman from Breaking Bad, because "S'aul good, man," and both of my goals -- weight loss/health and tv writing/Hollywood are arenas filled with shysters and navigating them is part of the trip. So, here I am. Back to blogging. Back to working out. Back to progress.

You can do anything, if you stop trying to do everything. ~ Oliver Emberton